Young(ish), urban, professional – YUP. Spouse, kids – Nope.

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So what is the cut off age for young nowadays? Is it true that 30 is the new 20? If so, does that make 40 the new 30? Or is it just that as we age, we just re-define the age group and re-write the rules in a way that suits our own egos? Life is funny because the milestone birthdays unveil unfulfilled expectations. That can come as a pleasant surprise or a rude awakening. What’s worse is when the people around you highlight any perceived deficit. Still looking for the right special someone to settle down with? Happily trucking along solo? Either way, there is a heckler at the ready with a fist full of tomatoes aimed at your face. We have this expectation of our selves and others expect certain things of us as well. It may come in the form of silent judgement, subtle hints or a big juicy tomato to the forehead…but the judgment is there like an elephant in the room. There is no avoiding it. All the intrusive, whys and why nots and whens and how comes…tossed around causally like accusations. Maybe you have an alternative lifestyle? That would certainly explain it! Yes! Makes perfect sense! The double life theory!!! You only pretend to be a well mannered professional by day, but by night you are swinging from chandalers and hanging out in seedy reststop bathrooms hoping for an anonymous hook up. Or maybe you just think you are forever young and insist on reliving the glory days of your 20s for as long as possible. Then there is the ever popular assumption that something (God only knows what) but surely something is wrong with you. A 6th toe? Bad breath? just plain crazy? Well, no matter what the reason, one thing is for sure. Houston, we have a problem.

So how does one navigate the slings and arrows of the well meaning life hecklers who yell out calls from the sidelines? The arm chair quarterbacks who are full of unwanted suggestions. They seem to grow in number with every passing year. And with every passing year it is harder and harder to duck the tomatoes.

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